Talk:Bill Willis/GA1

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GA Review

[edit]

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Reviewer: Resolute (talk · contribs) 21:59, 8 October 2012 (UTC)[reply]

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects): b (focused):
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:
  6. It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
  7. Overall:
    Pass/Fail:
General
College career
  • "Willis volunteered for the U.S. Army, but was declared 4F due to varicose veins." - While the link to Selective Service System 4F is helpful, I think adding context to this article explaining what 4F means would help. Perhaps something as simple as "was declared ineligible ([[Selective Service System|4F)..."
    • Added a description saying "classified as 4-F, or only available in case of a national emergency". I also piped the link to the specific section in the selective service article dealing with classifications. --Batard0 (talk) 04:58, 9 October 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • "But under his substitute..." - Remove the "but". "Under his substitute..." is sufficient
  • As a magazine, Look should be italicized.
Professional career
  • "...he planned to go play in Canada. Willis was about to leave for Canada..." - the double use of 'leaving for Canada' reads awkwardly to me. Perhaps just change the second statement to "...was about to leave for Montreal..." just to bypass the double usage there.
  • Italicize Columbus Dispatch.
  • "He came off that ball with that ball as quick as anything you would want to see." - He came off that ball with that ball? Is this the actual quote or a typo?
Overall